Thus Far

I am not very good at the Christmas spirit. Most years, I'm insistent that the holiday season does not begin until after the fourth Thursday of November, and I used to hate when stores would unveil their Christmas wreaths and trees right after Halloween. There were even a few years when I never felt that desire for the Christmas season at all (until maybe Christmas Eve or something) and went through the whole of December wondering if I was becoming the Grinch.  This year, though, I was the one ready for the holidays before October even ended. I snuck in some of my favorites, For King and Country, Pentatonix, and Jess and Gabe’s “I’ll Be Home for Christmas,” while nibbling on Halloween candy. A part of me kept thinking that there was no way Thanksgiving was already around the corner, yet at the same time, I was quite content with my mishmash of vibrant leaves and holiday jingles. I noticed a similar anomaly last year, in that I was READY for the holidays by the time Decembe...

Unsplash The snow—even fake snow—the wreaths, the Christmas color, and decor. The tree, the giving, the scents. The lights, the events, the togetherness. A brief little pocket of the year, where everything and everyone can be just a little bit better, a touch more wonderful, and a lot more magical. Christmas comes but once a year, and I want to enjoy every moment. 😊

Thanking God for all His wonderful blessings as the holiday season begins! 😊 Hope you all are having a glorious day and a magical start to your holiday season! 

I realized the other day that my first novel turns 10 this year. I had written other things before, of course—I’ve been a storyteller for as long as I can remember—but Elliot’s story was the first that I wrote trying to be a true author. Then titled Take Me As I Am, after the FM Static song , I began it on November 14 th , 2011, smack in the middle of NaNo season, after my mom stumbled across the NaNoWriMo Young Writers’ website and mentioned it to me. With no other plans for November, I set my goal at 5,000 words (mostly because I had no idea what word count was  😄 ) and shocked myself by making it to 14,000 within two weeks and finishing the first draft of the book. It was the first story I’d written seriously, my first complete start-to-finish piece, and the one that set me on my path, aiming to become a traditionally published author. We haven’t quite made it there yet for my scarred and sassy bae, but I’m incredibly proud of the story and of the things we have done tog...

Written October 2021. Part of the reason I started this blog was to learn to write again. Funnily enough, throughout most of 2020, I was on a roll. I worked on a short story, longform fanfiction, started two novels of my own, wrote a blog post a month on either Summer Snowflakes or Verbosity , and progressed in various other projects that I’d had sitting for a while. I wrote 40,000 words during NaNoWriMo and finished the final 10,000 in December. All that while completing my Associates Degree, dealing with constant shifts and changes at work, navigating various problems that come with life, and then all the rest that 2020 held for us in general. Somehow, in all of that, I managed to make writing my refuge; I wrote at least 60,000 words, not even counting all of what I edited, and I was and am extremely proud of that. Then 2021 happened. Suddenly, there was no more work to do. I had finished my degree. My job had more or less settled. The problems in my personal life… well, they ...

  So. I watched the Black Widow movie. What I Loved: Yelena. Just Yelena. Just look at her little face In all seriousness though, Natasha's sister made the movie—to the point that I almost feel like it should’ve been called Yelena Belova , instead of Black Widow . Granted, they’re both Black Widows, but, you know. I don’t think that’s a good thing on the storytelling side (more on that later), but from an entertainment standpoint, I didn’t mind it. Yelena is such a genuine sweetheart, so cute and funny and sassy and NORMAL, despite all she was subjected to and forced to do.  I think that's actually what made me fall so in love with her: the fact that she feels . So many others in that Marvel spy arena either pretend they don’t feel or laugh it off in this wry, sarcastic kind of way, or kind of walk around with sad eyes but never really say what’s going on. Yelena wears all her emotions on her sleeve, totally unapologetically. She still does the job and she focuses on th...

 Because it sounds cool. To me anyway. But also, because it feels right for this stage of my life. I’m in that discovery stage of the 20’s; I was one of those teens who thought they knew EXACTLY where they were going and EXACTLY what they were gonna do. But then, things didn’t pan out: online, writing wasn’t working; in real life, relationships fell apart; and I just couldn’t move forward the way I thought I would and the way I wanted to. And that was before 2020. 😉 In the aftermath of some of it and still in the throes of the rest of it, I find myself realizing how much I want to say but how little I know how to say it. It feels pompous, to me, for me to try to speak on universal things, whether they be emotional, mental, just life stuff, or the political and social spheres none of us can seem to break out of. Whatever the topic, I am always second-guessing myself and questioning myself. My work is not good enough, my mind whispers. I haven’t lived long enough, I think, and e...